On April 2nd, 1792, Congress passed the Coinage Act of 1792. This act established the United States Mint. It also authorized the government to begin to stockpile precious metals ostensibly for pressing coins. This was all a clever ruse however, as it really allowed the government to devalue the currency and cheapen the wealth of all men. Through exercising their murder monopoly, the government was able to hoard all the pure metals and leave the false ones behind, killing those who dissented. Those killed for their dissent include Benedict Arnold, who died in 1801 after moving against the one world government. He was poisoned with uric acid in a one world government plot to prevent him from restoring the true gold to the masses.
I have documented this truth more fully in a series of marble composition notebooks that I keep in my hamper. Periodically I will reveal more as my research compromises the great secrets of the Illuminati. For now I fear that I have already said too much.
Life in the basement is a simple existence. I have but a bucket of excrement as my only pal, and he has gained weight appreciably since his introduction to the pantry. This is the key to an environment where the best work can be done with the greatest ease. Readers, you have not lived until you live off of only hot dogs in an oubliette of your own devise.
I'm a genius, and as pure as the gold restoration ideals for which we toil.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Octopus
Today I made 4 slices up most of the length of the hot dogs before putting them in the marinade. Then I sliced each of the 4 slices in half vertically so that I created a hot dog octopus. Octopus. Octopus. What a strange word.
The octopus is a cephalopod and may be as smart as most dogs. It has 8 tentacles and a nasty beak that it uses to consume lesser creatures. Some octopuses are poisonous, but hot dog octopuses are not. Hot dog octopus tastes good with the hot dog marinade mixture.
As a bipedal being with only 4 limbs I have been spending my time imagining my life as a unipedal creature. Standing on one foot. First the left foot. Then the right foot. Which is a better foot to use as the only foot? It is clearly the left foot, because when looking into a mirror, the right foot is the left foot and that is just wrong. You see, only mirrors show the true appearance of things. The right is actually the left and the left is actually the right and mankind has been making its spatial assessments all wrong since the beginning of time.
Delusional public. I typed that standing on one foot.
The octopus is a cephalopod and may be as smart as most dogs. It has 8 tentacles and a nasty beak that it uses to consume lesser creatures. Some octopuses are poisonous, but hot dog octopuses are not. Hot dog octopus tastes good with the hot dog marinade mixture.
As a bipedal being with only 4 limbs I have been spending my time imagining my life as a unipedal creature. Standing on one foot. First the left foot. Then the right foot. Which is a better foot to use as the only foot? It is clearly the left foot, because when looking into a mirror, the right foot is the left foot and that is just wrong. You see, only mirrors show the true appearance of things. The right is actually the left and the left is actually the right and mankind has been making its spatial assessments all wrong since the beginning of time.
Delusional public. I typed that standing on one foot.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Buttons
Luckily my wi-fi reaches down into the basement. The first day of the basement plan went well. I've smoked my days quota of cigarettes and gone through about a pack of hot dogs. The Wall Street Journal is fresh as ever. I have been urinating into a joint compound bucket partially filled with coffee grounds to tame the smell of waste. Early this morning I defecated into it and the striking juxtaposition of the dark brown grounds with the light brown feces was a sight to behold. A tan cetacean, his echolocation ruined, lies marooned, glistening on the coarse mahogany sand. The uncertainty remains surrounding whether or not the lid will blow off from pressure created by the mixture during the coming days, so I've put a few bricks on top to keep it in there.
More hot dogs in the hot plate. I'm developing an affinity for the hot dog recipe. This recipe is a processed meat ambrosia, this basement my Elysium. If only the ancient Greeks had hot dogs their empire would still flourish today, our fossil fuel woes solved by riding great chariots through the streets.
However, uncertainty of how to pass the time between hot dogs mounts. I have been playing a game where I turn off the lights, rip a button off my shirt and toss the button in the room, trying to find it by touch until I do, and then tossing it again.
So far I've found the button five times and lost four buttons. I'm sure they'll turn up in the next few days so long as I can keep searching. This basement preparation ritual is a great American tradition, and I'm thankful for all the words of encouragement I've received from the readership and the fine folks at the national hot dog and sausage council.
More hot dogs in the hot plate. I'm developing an affinity for the hot dog recipe. This recipe is a processed meat ambrosia, this basement my Elysium. If only the ancient Greeks had hot dogs their empire would still flourish today, our fossil fuel woes solved by riding great chariots through the streets.
However, uncertainty of how to pass the time between hot dogs mounts. I have been playing a game where I turn off the lights, rip a button off my shirt and toss the button in the room, trying to find it by touch until I do, and then tossing it again.
So far I've found the button five times and lost four buttons. I'm sure they'll turn up in the next few days so long as I can keep searching. This basement preparation ritual is a great American tradition, and I'm thankful for all the words of encouragement I've received from the readership and the fine folks at the national hot dog and sausage council.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Basement Man
Today is a milestone day in my action plan. This morning I went down into my basement pantry where I will stay and make all the posts for the coming week. To build up strength I have stocked the pantry with the following items:
Onions
Scallions
Garlic
Hot dogs (frozen in coffin freezer)
Shoyu
Mirin
Ginger root
Sugar
Defrost hotdogs.
Mix 1/2 cup Shoyu and 1/2 cup Mirin together in a bowl with 2 tablespoons of sugar. Chop hot dogs and marinate in sauce for 30 minutes.
Chop onions and scallions and set aside. Smash a garlic clove or two and add to the onions and scallions. Finely grate a bit over ginger over the pan. How much depends on preference.
Heat up a frying pan on the stove. In this case a hot plate will be used.
Pour hot dogs and marinade into the frying pan. Add onions, scallions and garlic. Allow to boil in the liquid for 5-6 minutes. Serve over rice (optional) or eat straight, reserving some sauce as dressing.
There's no rice in store this week, because this regimen will require consuming only the hot dogs. The aim for this following week (until July 3rd), will be to eat a pack of hot dogs per day and to smoke at least 500 cigarettes in the basement pantry, and to not leave for any reason.
I bought 5 copies of today's Wall Street Journal and will read them during my week of seclusion. After this I will be prepared for whatever comes.
Onions
Scallions
Garlic
Hot dogs (frozen in coffin freezer)
Shoyu
Mirin
Ginger root
Sugar
Defrost hotdogs.
Mix 1/2 cup Shoyu and 1/2 cup Mirin together in a bowl with 2 tablespoons of sugar. Chop hot dogs and marinate in sauce for 30 minutes.
Chop onions and scallions and set aside. Smash a garlic clove or two and add to the onions and scallions. Finely grate a bit over ginger over the pan. How much depends on preference.
Heat up a frying pan on the stove. In this case a hot plate will be used.
Pour hot dogs and marinade into the frying pan. Add onions, scallions and garlic. Allow to boil in the liquid for 5-6 minutes. Serve over rice (optional) or eat straight, reserving some sauce as dressing.
There's no rice in store this week, because this regimen will require consuming only the hot dogs. The aim for this following week (until July 3rd), will be to eat a pack of hot dogs per day and to smoke at least 500 cigarettes in the basement pantry, and to not leave for any reason.
I bought 5 copies of today's Wall Street Journal and will read them during my week of seclusion. After this I will be prepared for whatever comes.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
The Apocalypse
The financial ruin of the masses and how the one world government has devalued currency to the point that even our billionaires are destitute. What we haven't discussed is how the apocalypse is going to follow the psychic singularity, brought about by the efforts of the government. When the government formed the Federal Reserve System was created in 1913 by the Federal Reserve Act, the government began stockpiling gold at Fort Knox and in other secret locations around the world.
There is only one real gold and that has all been ferreted out by the scouts of the Illuminati and their agents. The gold bought and sold on the stock exchange is not this gold. This false gold was created through alchemical secrets that were lost to the dark ages and were contained in the library of Alexandria. The one world government needs to stockpile this gold because of the Rapture. When Jesus Christ returns to Earth with the saints to bring the reckoning to mankind and separate the believers from the idolaters, the false gold will lure the demons. These abominations will then rend the flesh of men and tear them limb from limb. The true gold, possessed currently only by the one world government and its agents, will form armies in the afterlife which will slay the demons and ensure its domination of the heavens.
The demons will come in the pre-chosen forms: the lords of the 9 hells with their furious whips to flay the men and impregnate the women with their demon seed. And from their loins will spring forth more demons, hungry for the false gold of men and subservient to the one world government. The Illuminati's goal of bringing about the end of man will then be fulfilled.
There is only one real gold and that has all been ferreted out by the scouts of the Illuminati and their agents. The gold bought and sold on the stock exchange is not this gold. This false gold was created through alchemical secrets that were lost to the dark ages and were contained in the library of Alexandria. The one world government needs to stockpile this gold because of the Rapture. When Jesus Christ returns to Earth with the saints to bring the reckoning to mankind and separate the believers from the idolaters, the false gold will lure the demons. These abominations will then rend the flesh of men and tear them limb from limb. The true gold, possessed currently only by the one world government and its agents, will form armies in the afterlife which will slay the demons and ensure its domination of the heavens.
The demons will come in the pre-chosen forms: the lords of the 9 hells with their furious whips to flay the men and impregnate the women with their demon seed. And from their loins will spring forth more demons, hungry for the false gold of men and subservient to the one world government. The Illuminati's goal of bringing about the end of man will then be fulfilled.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
The Destroyer
In 1950, men and women lived happily and the United States was a great place. We had lots of money and were world leaders in culture and prosperity. As the millstone that is the corrupted one world government slowly eroded, the United States and the world as a whole have taken a turn for the worse. Back in the golden ages of our country and our planet, we had so much money to invest and upon which to receive return that even the poorest Americans were millionaires in today's currency.
This is because of what the one world government doesn't want you to know. That they have systematically devalued the world's currency while hoarding the world's true wealth: the ancient documents from the razed library of Alexandria that allow them to use psychic mind control on the citizenry of the United States and of the world.
Take a look at the Seal of the United States. The pyramid with the eye on the back plainly says below it "Novus Ordo Seclorum", latin for New Order of the Ages. Throughout the history of man, the Illuminati has covertly worked to undermine the wealth of the average man and hoard his mind control foci in a great conspiracy. When the Illuminati became an object of public focus in the late 1800s and early 1900s, they began to use these ancient foci of mind control to subvert world leaders and ultimately cause the formation of the federal reserve system, a system designed to devalue the currency of men and women just like you and I.
Having read this document, everyone can plainly see that we must shield ourselves from the influence of the one world government on our currency and on our minds. How you ask? All is revealed.
"And I stood upon the sand of the sea, and saw a beast rise up out of the sea, having seven heads and ten horns, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the name of blasphemy.
This is because of what the one world government doesn't want you to know. That they have systematically devalued the world's currency while hoarding the world's true wealth: the ancient documents from the razed library of Alexandria that allow them to use psychic mind control on the citizenry of the United States and of the world.
Take a look at the Seal of the United States. The pyramid with the eye on the back plainly says below it "Novus Ordo Seclorum", latin for New Order of the Ages. Throughout the history of man, the Illuminati has covertly worked to undermine the wealth of the average man and hoard his mind control foci in a great conspiracy. When the Illuminati became an object of public focus in the late 1800s and early 1900s, they began to use these ancient foci of mind control to subvert world leaders and ultimately cause the formation of the federal reserve system, a system designed to devalue the currency of men and women just like you and I.
Having read this document, everyone can plainly see that we must shield ourselves from the influence of the one world government on our currency and on our minds. How you ask? All is revealed.
"And I stood upon the sand of the sea, and saw a beast rise up out of the sea, having seven heads and ten horns, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the name of blasphemy.
And the beast which I saw was like unto a leopard, and his feet were as the feet of a bear, and his mouth as the mouth of a lion: and the dragon gave him his power, and his seat, and great authority."
Revelation 13:1-2
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
2012 and the psychic singularity
The end of the world as we know it is coming and I know when. In 2012, at the end of the astonishingly accurate Mayan calendar, the world is going to undergo a massive psychic shift. As oil runs out and global governments falter, the average citizen is going to have to make it on his own. I've already talked about the values of investing in sexual intercourse in the previous post. I want to underscore the important of planning for this psychic singularity.
When December 21 of 2012 arrives, the psychic barriers between individual consciousnesses will be broken down and mankind will think with one mind. As we all know, humans are currently using only 10% of their brains. As impressive as all our works created today are, their magnitude is only amplified considering that the other 90% of our brains have been idle all this time. When the 2012 consciousness shift hits, we will unlock the true potential of our new 'hive' mind. Social insects have unlocked the secrets of cooperating with a sole, unflapping consciousness eons ago. It is, naturally, the next step in man's development.
Once the psychic singularity is reached, technology will advance at an unprecedented pace. If we do not prepare now by making as many offspring in our image as possible, our individual consciousnesses will be drowned out in the merging with the masses. Readers: reproduce now before your mental virtues are annihilated by the coming inevitable singularity.
When December 21 of 2012 arrives, the psychic barriers between individual consciousnesses will be broken down and mankind will think with one mind. As we all know, humans are currently using only 10% of their brains. As impressive as all our works created today are, their magnitude is only amplified considering that the other 90% of our brains have been idle all this time. When the 2012 consciousness shift hits, we will unlock the true potential of our new 'hive' mind. Social insects have unlocked the secrets of cooperating with a sole, unflapping consciousness eons ago. It is, naturally, the next step in man's development.
Once the psychic singularity is reached, technology will advance at an unprecedented pace. If we do not prepare now by making as many offspring in our image as possible, our individual consciousnesses will be drowned out in the merging with the masses. Readers: reproduce now before your mental virtues are annihilated by the coming inevitable singularity.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Financiality
Today I was on my way to the sustainable organic market to buy free-range chicken when I thought of something. It's been raining for a couple of days and I'm sure it is due to global warming. As the climate change progresses, those of us who are not preparing for a drastic change in the habitability of the earth will have their ways of life undone. This unmaking will lead to their infertility and eventual demise and the start of the 7 biblical plagues.
As the rain drops fall I've realized the importance of divesting my stores of currency and investing in commodities. Amongst these commodities are sustainable agriculture, guns and sex. The necessity of the first two of these things is unquestioned and need not be explained. However, I have realized that buying sex is the key to investing for the future. Sure, some analysts on CNN are going on about investing in gold, or oil, or foreign wars. But I've realized that if we don't stop our institutionalized murder culture and start to buy sex to reproduce, we will run out of people and leave all of our gear as a rotting monument of nothing on the face of God's earth.
So please, tell your friends, tell your parents, buy sex now before it is too late.
As the rain drops fall I've realized the importance of divesting my stores of currency and investing in commodities. Amongst these commodities are sustainable agriculture, guns and sex. The necessity of the first two of these things is unquestioned and need not be explained. However, I have realized that buying sex is the key to investing for the future. Sure, some analysts on CNN are going on about investing in gold, or oil, or foreign wars. But I've realized that if we don't stop our institutionalized murder culture and start to buy sex to reproduce, we will run out of people and leave all of our gear as a rotting monument of nothing on the face of God's earth.
So please, tell your friends, tell your parents, buy sex now before it is too late.
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