The Looming Truth

The truth exists independent of the observer. This can be easily observed. Take something that you know is true. Now think about that. True, isn't it? Even without the consideration of your feeble mind, reader, it would be true.

The same is true of good and bad. For example, take something good, like eating an apple, or injecting heroin into the tip of your penis. These things are good because they are observed to be good. But what if we change the truth of them, and view them instead as bad. Then they are bad. And so, good and bad only exist in the eye of the observer. Therefore, good and bad are falsehoods, and the only truths exist independently of their being observed.

Now consider the coming apocalypse in light of these facts. Is the apocalypse good, or is it bad? The answer is neither, reader. The apocalypse is TRUE, because it will exist independent of you or me. Even if you kill your parents and eat their bones the apocalypse will grind on, eroding the fabric of your life and mine. We will be cooked like coca-cola glazed hams and served up to the reptilian sorceror Barack Obama.

The government has worked hard to obscure the truth, but in doing so, have revealed it in spite of themselves. The government is a league of lizardmen. For many years they were incubated in earthen mounds. Upon their hatching, they have advanced the agendas of the abhorrent wizards of the ruling class. The downtrodden amongst them are mixed with bowel movements and recycled into the mound. A sickly sweet smell fills the air around the mounds. It is the unmistakable smell of a pastry shop.

The lizardmen use this cloyingly sweet musk to deceive us and to advance their falsehoods. That is the way of the government. In these cases, Barack Obama uses unknowing, subservient humans to pre-chew his food. Behind his visage lies a terrible secret - that he is incapable of mastication. A team made up of one man and one woman alternate hourly shifts chewing his primarily vegan diet and extruding it from their mouths into his. As we speak, a tortured rope of food slips from their lips to his, and his body is nourished while theirs fail.

This is the truth.